hi
Welcome everybody
These are some jokes in English
goog luck with them
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Teacher: History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what had happened in the past
Student: Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history
Teacher: Why
Student: There is no future in it
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Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much
would your father still have
Ted: $10
Teacher: You don't know maths
Ted: You don't know my father
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Mother: David, come here
David: Yes, mom
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse
David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow
Mother: I know that. But I am going to
Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now
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Father: Why did you fail your mathematics test
Son: On Monday, teacher
said 3+5=8
Father: So
Son: On Tuesday, she
said 4+4=8 and on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer
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A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father
Daughter: It's mummy
Father: How do you know
Daughter: She didn't say anything
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Girl: Do you love me
Boy: Yes Dear
Girl: Would you die for me
Boy: No, mine is undying love
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Man: How old is your father
Boy: As old as me
Man: How can that be
Boy: He became a father only when I was born
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Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg
Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu card
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Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything
Son: That's why I say she's no good
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Teacher: "Where were you born
Student: "
Singapore, Sir
Teacher: "Which part
Student: "All of me, Sir
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A teacher was asking her class: "What is the difference between unlawful' and 'illegal
Only one hand shot up
"Ok, answer, Joan"
said the teacher
"'Unlawful' is when u do something the law doesn't allow and 'illegal' is a sick eagle
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A boy came home from school with his exam results
What did u get?" asked his father
"My marks are under water
said the boy
"What do u mean 'under water'
"They are all below 'C' (sea) level"
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